Dear Teenage Boy

Although it may seem like your world is perfect from an outsiders view, don't forget that it was your parents' who helped your upbringing. Don't forget to be thankful of them everyday. To say a prayer to the Lord and Savior who created you. Whether you believe it or not, God is your Creator. He knows you better than you can imagine. Don't take for granted of your life. Be the person whom you were created to be. Live life with a mindful of love even for those you despise. Love those around you because you never know if it's your last day spent with them. Be appreciative with what you have now rather than looking for something you don't have. Treasure each moment because you can't take that day and time back. Time is spent and gone just like money. But, time can't be brought back so spend it wisely. Give more than take because giving is such a gratifying way of life..whether it be money, time or love. Giving is better than receiving in all ways. But love is the most important. Because it makes or breaks the relationship with another person. Without love, you're nothing. You're just simply existing, not living. Live life with an abundance of love. To your family, friends and enemies. Enemies can be changed to friends..it just takes one to be a friend. This is all for tonight. Live life, boy. Don't just merely exist.
-xluulx

College Life

Life of a College Stud ;) So, I didn't realize how much I'd like college, especially Drury and the people in it! I feel like I've changed SO much since college has started... Things that changed for me: 1) I am more outgoing.
2) Thus, I have more friends.
3) Thus, I have more confidence in myself.
4) Thus, I am not as scared to participate in class.
5) Thus, I am more motivated to learn..
6) I even make it to school on time! I feel like a brand new person!
& I know the answer why: God did something amazing in my life that really changed me spiritually this summer... I finally got baptized in the Holy Spirit and that has definitely given me more confidence in Him & myself. Because of this experience, I am now able to trust and depend on God much more than ever before. I am so grateful for Him working in my life because I can remember since I first went to church camp and saw Abby being baptized in the Holy Ghost, I wanted to experience what she did and was more curious to know what God can do in my life. I am so thankful for this experience. After that, life has become a lot 'easier' in a sense... At school, it's still challenging, but I am actually able to contribute to the class and pay attention 99% of the time. At work, I don't get mad at people as much as I had in the past...I would try to love everyone by being understanding of why they act the way the do. At home, I try not to get flustered by my dad's religious views..I am just focused on controlling my own behavior and being a loving daughter. So what I'm saying is that God, working in my life, has affected me in all aspects of my life for the better. Without him, I would not be the person I am today. I would not be as loving as I am..although I could still work on that. I would not have approached the people I had like Ming, by talking about God because I wouldn't have had confidence in myself and the desire to share about God and inviting him to my church... God always knows how to change our messed up lives for the better. As long as we trust in Him, we can do anything. For God is our strength in our times of trouble!

Blessings

God, how could I ever deny Your love and care?
Your blessings are clearly an abundance of love.
When I needed You by my side, You were there.
How can I deny You for what you've done for me??
I only want to THANK You for loving me...
for being by my side,
for being my inner strength,
for letting it be a smooth ride..
all through my doubts, troubles, and fears.
I want to sing praise to your name!
I want to be overflowing with joyful tears!
I want to experience the Holy Spirit..
and never forsake You..Just as You have never forsaken me..
But, I know that I will continue to fall & make mistakes.
However, I do not want that to fail our relationship.
I'm going to keep this burning desire for You in my life.
I'm going to do all that I can to encourage my brothers/sisters in Christ.
I'm going to pray and read the Bible more everyday.
No matter if I have an abundance of homework because You always provide me what I need.
You are the one who I can depend on.
NOt my homework!
So, I just wanted to say..
I am so grateful for the great blessings that you've provide even if I have not consistently been faithful in our relationship throughout my high school years.
The amount that you've provided me with is SO much more than I could have ever imagined receiving.
I shall never forget this great blessing and previous blessings you've blessed me with...
I hope that I will always think: I must please my Lord and Savior
Rather than myself or anyone else..
I need to put you FIRST.
family 2nd,
friends 3rd,
strangers 4th,
& me LAST.
Will you guide me towards this Lord?
I know it's what You want for everyone.
So, this is my goal: to spread Your love to whomever I can and whenever I can.
Thank you Jesus for showing me Your love.
THrough the abundance of scholarships.
And I want to praise You for this!!!
Thank You and Hallelujah!!! Jesus Christ is my Lord and Savior.

My Passion/Dream/Goal...???

What is my passion?
When will I find out what I REALLY WANT TO BE?
Where will I go to college?
What will I major in?
When will I fully serve Jesus?
When will I testify about Jesus?
When will I love others unconditionally?
There are so many questions out there that I want to know SO BADLY. But, I know that I cannot just get all the answers in one day because it takes TIME to learn everything.
That's why we go to school everyday. To Learn something new that we haven't learned before...
We have to learn how to Trust in the Lord because He has a PLAN for us. He is the Light of the World that can give us eternal life in Heaven. But, first we must do our duty as humans on Earth.
So I pray that I will be able to fulfill the Lord's plans for me. For I know that he has GREAT plans in my life. I want Him to use me. Not the other way around. I want to be Jesus' servant because He is the only one I can depend on in this life. And because He is the TRUTH, WAY AND LIFE.
I need you, Lord.
In my life.
RIght now.
Please accept me.
Thank you so much for loving me.
For always being there for me.
Even though I don't acknowledge your presence in my life (at times).
LIGHTBULB just clicked!
I used to have a stalker...and he was a big stalker. The biggest one on this Earth, I believe.
Because of this, I ignored him..
well eventually, I realized he was not a bad guy...and so I gradually accepted him into my life. Now he is practically the love of my life. I cannot believe I would love Him so deeply...because I always thought that he was just creepy...xD But, now I know that LOVE IS POSSIBLE!
So...How does this relate to God? Well for one, God = Love.
AND God is always there for me even though I may not see Him and at moments ignore Him (like my stalker). But, I know that when I accept Him for who He is. (and not for what I made Him out to be...) I will truly be in LOVE with the Lord! Hallelujah for the HOLY SPIRIT INSIDE OF ME! <3 Thank you Jesus for giving up your life and sending the Holy Spirit to us! Thanks for guiding me and being my Shepard...even if I lose my way pretty easily... I don't believe that I'm the brightest sheep (if that's even real...lol..pretty sure all sheep are dumb..But that's not the point).
Point is: I NEED to spend time with My Savior! I have to talk to Jesus.
like a best friend. Not just some picture or a wall.
But, the real Jesus who lives inside me and my small heart. <3
Amen & Goodnight!

Em0ti0ns

When one feels down, one should smile.
When one feels sad, one should laugh.
When one feels happy, one should spread the joy to another.
When one feels bored, one should become active.
When one feels angry, one should close their eyes and focus on breathing.
When one feels nervous, one should take a couple of deep breathes.
When one feels irritated, one should think positive thoughts.
When one feels disappointed, one should try again.
When one feels guilty, one should apologize/ask for forgiveness.
When one feels burdened, one should take a break.
When one feels panicked, one should keep his/her cool.
When one feels worried, one should remember that your troubles will leave eventually.
When you feel any of these above, JUST PRAY PRAY PRAY to Jesus because He is always listening.
Ask Him to help you be joyful in all your circumstances.
Ask Him to help you be His BEST witness in spreading His love for everyone.
Ask Him to help you BE His active servant.
Ask Him to help you forgive those who wronged you/yourself for wronging others.
Ask Him to help you relieve your daily stresses.
Ask Him to help you be free from this world.
Ask Him to guide you today, tomorrow, and forever.
Don't STOP praying and asking.
For Jesus said, "Keep on asking, and you will be given what you ask for. Keep on looking, and you will find. Keep on knocking, and the door will be opened. For everyone who asks, receives. Everyone who seeks, finds. And the door is opened to everyone who knocks." -Matthew 7:7-8

Thanksgiving =D

This Thanksgiving was definitely a memorable one.
It included all my loved ones right beside me.
And it was the first time that I got to bring a guest!
My day started out with Jazzercise.
Then, I went back home to eat and take a nap.
And I helped my mom prepare the Viet food.
Back to the main point.
The special guest. =]
Honestly, before I went to pick him up, I kept thinking, "I don't know if this is a good idea..and it's going to be so awkward when people ask and what should i tell them about 'us'.."
Especially since the night before we had a discussion that wasn't so pleasant..but that's a different story we won't discuss now.
Anyways, when we got there and were there.. it was really fun and homey and normal.
I felt like it was not any of those things that I mentioned above.
I am excited for future parties/events.
I treasure each and every one of them more now because of this past one. :)
Thanks to my <3.

Renewal

I love being renewed and re-entering God's presence.
Its as if he knows when I need to do that.
and He gives me opportunites to be able to get back in the light.
The light is His Pathway that He has provided.
My goal is to stay in the light moving forward.
I want to make sure that I am not going to stay in one place.
I'm going to STOP all procastination. (even though I am right now..)
but I WILL pray about this!
Because I know God will give me an answer if I believe what I pray.
Many times, I fall into this guilty feeling of not worshipping, praying, or building my relationship with God.
Then, there are times I feel like I want to give up on everything.
And then there are times I want to rip my hair out.
But, I know that God is always there for me through these times.
Even when I fall, He picks me back up.
Even when I'm down in the dumps, He is handing me a rope.
Never giving up on me.
Because HE LOVES ME.
I want to choose to Love My GOD. Its already a fact He LOVES ME.
I want to choose to BELIEVE in HIM. Its already a fact I can do anything through Christ who strengthens Me. :)
I want to choose to follow His ways. Its already a fact that His ways are the BEST.
I want to choose to understand His word. Its already a fact that His word is the truth.
Thank YOU God for making me realize this.
I pray to do everything in YOUR NAME.
I thank you so much for everything You have given me..
When I was born into this world, i didn't have anything.
But, because of the family, friends, and people that you have put in my life, I am able to experience Your Love through them. <3
I appreciate this awesome day. (even though it was 13th) lol.
I LOVE YOU JESUS! =D

LUST

Seven Love Secrets:
I dont really have any..especially since I can't flirt.
1) Smile/laugh at everything he says while
2) making EYE CONTACT LOTS AND LOTS. look DEEP in his eyes.
3) COmpliment him on his stuff because you know guys love that.
4) Ask him to help you do stuff because they are nice enough to help out. (usually)
5) Talk to his friends and flirt with them to see what is his reaction.
6) Ignore him because too shy. thats what i seem to do a lot. which is kinda bad.
7) Be yourself. :) and remain calm.

GLUTTONY

Seven Guilty Pleasures:
1) Wasting Gas driving around
2) Not washing the Dishes
3) Eating all I want and not saving it for anyone
4) Getting Breakfast made
5) Texting/using facebook way too much
6) Not practicing piano
7) Treating others like dirt

SLOTH

7 THINGS I NEGLECT TO DO
1) Read the Bible..
2) Do my HW
3) Practice Singing/Piano
4) Clean my Room
5) Exercise
6) Wash Dishes
7) Shower.

WRATH

7 Things that make me MAD.
1) When someone doesn't pick up their phone and I am in need of them.
2) When I am sick and can't do anything about it.
3) Talking to people who are annoying.
4) Thinking about doing something, but don't. Getting in trouble later for not doing it.
5) Not being able to understand my homework or project or book.
6) Forgetting to do simple things that I'm asked of or responsibilities.
7) Having to fart but can't in class.

ENVY

Seven things I lack/covet:
1) Cute/Funny Couples
2) People who have been baptized in the Holy Spirit.
3) People with Smooth/flawless skin.
4) People who can draw/very artistic.
5) People who know how to play the guitar/can play piano by ear/sight read well
6) People who are athletic. (good at sports)
7) People who are super smart and can pick up on stuff really fast... Learning/working/running...etc.
8)People who can act.

Things I want to do:

That doesn't require money spending:
-watch the sunrise and the sunset
-build a snowman
-go sledding
-read in a treehouse
-sleep in a tent
-kiss in the rain
-swim with a lot of beautiful fish (that don't bite)
-save many lives (spiritually especially, but physically would be cool too)
-learn to knit a hat, scarf..
-bake a cake
-open people's minds to the truth
-plant my own vegetable or fruit garden
-fix something broken
-lead someone to God
-be a friend to those in need
-sew clothes, esp. shoes
-be a MoM,wife
:)

PRIDE

1) I'm really good at piano.
2) I can eat all I want and won't gain much.
3) I have a butt.
4) Long eyelashes.
5) Straight and white teeth.
6) Nice face shape.
7) Look better than the average asian.

7 Deadly Sins

Day 1 - Pride. Seven great things about yourself.
Day 2 - Envy. Seven things you lack and covet.
Day 3 - Wrath. Seven things that piss you off.
Day 4 - Sloth. Seven things you neglect to do.
Day 5 - Greed. Seven worldly material desires.
Day 6 - Gluttony. Seven guilty pleasures.
Day 7 - Lust. Seven love secrets.

Suessical Snow & Savior =]

Today, someone special sent me a morning text saying, "Stitch your smile on tight, don't let it fall off like a loose button. :)" Now THAT really brightened up my day by a LOT. =] I was like alright. I'm going to do JUST that.!
ANd when I got to school, it was a good day. Even though I almost lost my smile because the stitches weren't stitched on as good as they should have been..:)
It was a pretty stressless day. Very easygoing. Tutoring I didn't even have to tutor, just answer a bunch of questions in essay format. I dillydallied on that. ha, it was fun though. ENglish-MY FAVORITE. Its official. I only LOVE that class mainly because of Mrs. Roberts and her teaching skills. Haha, we had a pop quiz, but I didn't miss that many. so that was good. Then Lunch, and my new azn buddy that I met at the party got to sit at our table b/c apparently he had a test in his class. Choir was amazing! Only because the teacher has noticed I've improved! lol, imagine that. When I expect her to notice me (probably becuz i think i'm all that) , she don't. But she actually did (and this time I was thinking I'm sick, so I'm not going to be able to sing my best) She was like you've improved. I said really? I'm sick. *blush* and she just SMILES real big and laughs:) I l0ve Smitty when she is in a happy mood. xD Serioulsy, who doesn't? anyways, after school, I went to Smitty's room to try out for SEUSSICAL! & guess who I find? Mr. Barney! I was soo happy that he agreed to be my partner. Some girl asked him once sec after I did. Lol, so I beat her to the punch. *POW* :D Then, we practiced the steps and actually did really good on the tryouts! I'm glad the tryout was in one day rather than two.. the routine was actually really easy. EVen though I messed up, Smitty seemed to notice my facial expressions rather than my dance steps. & she was smiling at me so big. Lol, I was thinking don't matter if I mess up, because they aren't looking for perfection, but rather facials. LOL. Yup, then I'm looking outside and a tad bit worried of that snow. It makes me worry about driving in it..ohhh gosh. As I was half way home, I'm thinking this is not slippery. Just snow, not ice ya know? But then suddenly there was a slippery spot, and the car was slipping and I was getting closer and closer to the car in front of me. I had hit the gas wasn't going more than 30, but quickly put the brakes. The brakes wasn't doing it, so guess what I did? I put the ebreak. ANd then it stopped slipping. Later, I'm telling people about the E break happening. They tell me that the E-break could've made me spin..I'm like ooooh. I didn't know. Well, at least this time it didn't do that! :) Praise God, my ONE & ONLY SAVIOR! eh? :)Yeah, and so as I sit here right now typing about this, I'm just loving on God thanking Him for making me smile and keeping me safe. Thanking him that he indeed has a promise for me in the end. That everyday, is a day closer towards entering His Kingdom & leaving this Earth. This place full of things that I shouldn't attach myself to.

LIVE LIKE WE'RE DYING

That's the song that I'm currently listening to..:)
so NEW YEARS HAS PASSED! OMGOMGOMGOMG!
Its time to get into action.
Kick some booty.
THink about whos to kick and KICK.! jk.
Okay..so I have some resolutions to add on:
1. Never be late again.
2. Stop Procastination..because it CAN kill people.
3. Think before speaking.
4. Breathe.
5. Drink DRINK DRINK WATER!!!!
6. Always remain calm & tranquil no matter what the situation is.
7. Facebook = see you at 10pm forever...
8. Read the Bible at least twice a day.
9. Apologize if being mean and mean it!
10. Don't ignore purposely. :) *wave*
11. Greet EVERYONE AND SMILE. =D
12. Don't interrupt.=x
13. Keep car clean. (at least cleaner than bro's...) gosh, thats gonna be so hard.
14. Trust in the Lord!
15. Pray every hour? (tick tock tick tock)
16. I guess that means in my dream ima be praying too! xD
17. Acknowledge my weaknesses in certain subjects and STUDY THEM.
18. Pick out clothes for the next day.
19. Watch what I'm about to eat & amount. Don't eat until you feel BLOATED.
20. Understand that people WILL make fun of you, but you can always ignore them in a respectful manner.
21. Time is important. MANAGE IT.
22. EXERCISE. It should be stressfree but I feel like I'm stressing over just trying to make myself do it.
23. Think positively.
24. Play the piano for dogggy.~
25. Shop less. $$$
Thats about it for now. I had to play that song for 3 times to last this whole note..haha

Ignoring?

Is it a sin? I can't decide..
I guess its not really loving like we should.
But, I'm just shy-ish.
Even though we know each other (pretty well).
I can't just go up to them and talk to them.
Why?
I don't purposely ignore..
Okay, maybe I do.
But I think..
I just like being in my comfort zone too much.
Is that also a sin?
To stay in your comfort zone and not get to know others?
To not even greet them?
To just pretend they don't exist?
Sigh...
Life + People= confusing mix.

Joy.

My joy in life seems to be depended on earthly values (most of the time) rather than focused on God. I need to get back with God. It feels like the fire inside of me is slowly flaming. Its almost bURNT OUT. School definitely keeps my mind more focused on NON nonsense.. well sometimes. lol. I feel like I'm getting lazy everyday. I am slowly turning away from reading the Bible. I don't pray as much as I should. I hope to find someone who is ON FIRE for God as my future husband. :) I hope that he will always bring me closer into wanting to be in God's presence. That would be sweet. Christmas presents have spoiled me..Especially the Money.
Today, my BFF was telling me she'd rather recieve a hug or kiss and a card rather than money. She said with money, its more difficult to humble herself before the Lord. She wants to remember His blessings that He gave her. But, its quite difficult to do that if you have a lot of money. And that reminds me of in the Bible, it says, "Matt 23 Then Jesus said to his disciples, “Truly I tell you, it is hard for someone who is rich to enter the kingdom of heaven." So its better to be poor, so you can remember God's blessings and keep in mind who the Lord is. Who was the one that provides me food and clothing to wear..

Gentlemen?

So, boys. Especially the boys at my C.
Most of these boys, I've grown up with since I was an iddy biddy kid.
I barely even talk/speak/ and any form of communication or physical contact with them. But, there's this kid who is new to my C..
he actually talks to me.
And wants to get to know me.
I should feel happy because there's someone who is a boy, that wants to get to know me and appreciates my presence.
He is truly a gentleman.
The other boys whom I've known all my life..
the vibe I recieve is:
I don't care about anything (well not all the time)
or I'm too shy to talk to you.
or I don't want to talk to you because I'm afriad of what people will think.
This dude doesn't do that.
He just goes for the goal=something I like. :)